One of the most persistent misunderstandings about BDSM is the idea that authority equals domination over another person’s will. That belief flattens the reality of power exchange and ignores the single element that makes BDSM what it is: consensual responsibility . In healthy BDSM dynamics, authority is not taken. It is offered —and then carefully held. A Dominant does not control a submissive’s autonomy. A submissive does not surrender their agency. What actually happens is